An Abridged Look at the Non-US Hits of 2022

 An Abridged Look at the Non-US Hits of 2022

In the following long overdue article, I take a look at both the good and the bad songs the 2022 year-end lists outside of the US gave us.

This is the 2nd time I’m doing an article like this, and honestly, the reason I haven’t done it this year until now was that I was waiting for the 2022 Non-US Hits rankdown to open on Pulse Music Board, but seeing as no one has done so, I just decided to take the liberty of making a list of songs that would be in that rankdown myself just to write this article. Yes, I know that I said I’d be taking a break until my 2023 lists, but I’ve always had a weird fascination of songs that were hits, not in the US, but outside of it, because on some level, that can show how much different pop culture tends to be in other countries, also, let’s be real, it’s probably  the only thing separating me from like, every other music hobbyist out there.

So last time I did a Non-US-Hits article, I only highlighted the songs that would’ve made my best list if they were US hits, this time, I plan on doing things a bit differently, I’ll look at both the best and the worst, so songs that would’ve made my 2022 worst list.

So with that in mind, these are the qualifications for the songs that I’m choosing to highlight. The songs that are highlighted in this article are the songs that became hits in the UK, Australia, or Canada that would’ve made my best or worst list for 2022 had they become hits in the US - and yes, the honorable and dishonorable mentions count. I will not mention songs that had made a previous non-US hits list - so no, you’re not gonna see “Another Love” by Tom Odell or “Lost” by Frank Ocean here - nor songs that had made a prior US list - so no, you’re not gonna see “Mr. Brightside” here either. Also, if the songs are set to become hits in the US in 2023, let’s take “I’m Good (Blue)” by David Guetta and Bebe Rexha for example, they don’t count either, there are a few songs that’ll likely straddle this line, I can think of at least one right now, but I’m covering some of those straddlers here just to be safe. And yes, my opinions have shifted quite a bit and my best and worst lists for 2022 would probably be slightly different if I made it now, but I was still able to pull something together. You got all that? Alright, let’s get this started with the worst!

Acraze f/Cherish - Do It To It (#36 AUS, #76 CAN, #82 UK)

Oh god, I hated this at the beginning of 2022 and every play I heard this get on my local pop station throughout its short-lived US run only soured me on this further, the original “Do It To It” by Cherish was already a US hit in 2006, and for a laid back R&B track, I actually really like it, it was actually quite close to making my best list for that year, but this slap house remix from DJ Acraze just sounds soulless all the way down, with Cherish’s vocals being pitched down in a Tiesto-esque way but this production feels too thin for it to work effectively. There is no personality here. Don’t get me wrong, I get why this exists, it’s supposed to just be an empty banger that goes off in a club, but when I listen to this, I don't hear anything fun you can go off to, all I here is a far too thin production with the pitched-down soul-sucking vocals, yeah, this was highly unnecessary. Bad song, next!!

Aitch & Ashanti - Baby (#18 UK)

This is gross. The original “Rock Wit U (Awww Baby)” is a good song, even if Ashanti has better songs in my humble opinion, but this feels like Aitch is desecrating the original here. The original is loose, playful, and fun, but this song, feels unsexy as hell, with Aitch not having any chemistry with the pitched up Ashanti sample and he sounds like he’d rather be anywhere else, I don’t believe it in the slightest when he says that he doesn’t only love her only for the sex. The entire song is literally about the hot, hot sex they have! Y’all think the sampling we have in the US hits these days is bad, y’all haven’t heard this utter ear poison.

ArrDee - Flowers (Say My Name) (#92 UK)

And yet the bad sampling isn’t stopping! Because this is a bad blend of Destiny’s Child’s “Say My Name” and “Flowers” by Sweet Female Attitude. The latter was already sampled in a great song in 2020 - “Flowers” by Nathan Dawe. It’s not even a mashup, it’s just clumsy sampling two songs. And the entire song’s sentiment is about how ArrDee won’t give these girls flowers - possibly implying he won’t treat them well, but he’ll instead give them hot, hot sex. And ArrDee is rapping with as much excitement and personality as, I don’t know, a wet roll of toilet paper. This song causes flowers to wilt, and there is a reason that very few, if any, people stateside say your name ArrDee. This sucks, moving on!

Belters Only f/Jazzy - Make Me Feel Good (#12 UK)

I was already hating this song with how much of a repetitive fragment this song is, but then I found out that this song was apparently stolen, and for more info on that, I’ll redirect you to this video.  And let’s just say that after finding out about this little factoid, this song soured on me even further. Yeah, that’s it, because this scummy song doesn’t deserve more attention.

Central Cee - Doja (#65 AUS, #85 CAN, #72 UK)

That opening line already lost me, and yeah, this is fails on the lyrics, which are embarrassingly bad and cringey, especially the lyric “How can I be homophobic?/My bitch is gay” and you can tell this song is only called “Doja” to get clicks. Yeah, this shit is terrible, and I dearly hope Doja Cat distanced herself as far as possible from this trainwreck.

Drake - Sticky (#69 CAN)

Honestly Nevermind is a mid album, and while this isn’t the worst song on it, there’s very little wonder why Beyonce won the 2022 house album battle against Drake. The two rap songs from Drake’s house album being the most successful songs from the album should say it all, really, despite a somewhat decent pulsating beat, Drake’s rapping is still as mediocre as ever. I like my fair share of Jersey Club - spoilers - but there’ll likely be two songs from that genre on my 2023 best list, but this sucks.

Elton John & Britney Spears - Hold Me Closer (#66 CAN)

Ugh, I used to like this song, I also did like “Cold Heart” with Dua Lipa at one point, but like that song, “Hold Me Closer” only continued to sour on me to the point where now I dislike them both, this may not be as bad as “Cold Heart” because I don’t find the production as cheap here, but that vocal mixing...yikes, it sounds utterly atrocious, it sounds like they’re singing underwater while being forced to eat soap, and there’s also the fact that this feels like a desecration of the original “Tiny Dancer”. Sure, the piano sounds nice, but it doesn’t mask that this is essentially watered down nu-disco, this sucks, and let’s hope Elton John stops trying to ruin his own songs after this.

Fireboy DML & Ed Sheeran - Peru (#3 UK)

Okay fine, I’ll concede that the production is pretty decent and Fireboy DML’s parts are pretty nice, but Ed Sheeran just falls into the background here, I literally have no idea when he’s singing here, when I have questions about who’s singing certain parts of a song, I usually go to Genius.com to check, but even on there, they seem to have no idea who’s singing what on this song, very telling, to be honest. This doesn’t really make me all that angry, but it still sucks, NEXT!!

Harry Styles - Music For A Sushi Restaurant (#79 UK, #94 CAN)

If this played at a sushi restaurant, I’d leave. There, now that the obvious joke is out of the way, let’s just get right to the song, it’s fucking awful, the worst song on Harry’s House and maybe of Harry Styles’s career thus far. Short version, this is basically “Bon Appetit” by Katy Perry again, and even though this isn’t as bad as that song, “Music For A Sushi Restaurant” additionally has a mind-numbingly repetitive hook and an atrocious falsetto from Styles. The horns don’t sound terrible, but when surrounded by everything else, it gets weighed down considerably. This just sounds like shit, it’s not even remotely close to sexy, no one wants to hear Harry lifelessly say that he can cook an egg on you (ewww). Fuck this garbage, not really music for a sushi restaurant more than music for an Apple ad.

Lee Brice - Soul (#81 CAN)

This is clunky in every way, mainly on the lyrics, which are about how Lee Brice likes this girl’s...soul? And this is while the verses are hornier and clearly hinting that Brice wants this girl’s body more than anything. But then there’s the weirdly heavy sounding production, it just doesn’t match with anything here. This isn’t all that hateable, rather than a musical enigma, skip this.

Luude f/Colin Hay - Down Under (#28 AUS, #23 UK)

This sounds utterly ugly, and according to Wikipedia, this is basically a remix of a children’s song, and wow, what an awful remix it is, the drum and bass percussion sounds really thin and the whistles(?) sound obnoxious. This sucks, NEXT!!

So that’s all the bad songs out of the way, now for the great stuff!

bbno$ f/Rich Brian - edamame (#23 CAN)

This was an instant click from the first time I heard it in 2021, and even now, this is fucking amazing. bbno$ and Rich Brian have effortless chemistry with each other as the trade bars so cleanly and have personality for days and the beat is super bouncy with those catchy as hell drums and the string touches. And I additionally can’t help but love the line “If you got your mask off in the photo, you getting cropped” This is super loose and playful with enough personality to make the horniness feel overboard. This is incredible, and yeah, I’m bitter as hell this never became a US hit.

Charlie Puth - Light Switch (#58 CAN, #88 AUS)

Yes, you don’t need to tell me that this is so obviously cribbing from “STAY” by The Kid LAROI and Justin Bieber, which is better than this and Charlie Puth also produced it. But “Light Switch” is just a synthpop banger, with the percussion sounding incredibly smooth and slick, and Charlie Puth’s vocals are mixed in a way where his falsetto sounds nice too! And the content, yeah I get how some could see it as a horny post filtered to be a pop song, but that’s what helps this not be shitty to me, put this in comparison with say, “Play” by David Banner, for instance, in that song, the horniness was so unfiltered that it made for one of the most uncomfortable listening experiences I’ve ever had. “Light Switch”, like “edamame” in a way, is loose and playful enough to still sound great to me.

Charlie Puth f/Jung Kook - Left & Right (#65 CAN)

The song where Charlie Puth flexes his knowledge of music production, and yeah, it’s absolutely great, mainly because of the audio panning from left to right on the chorus, and I’ve seen arguments that this wouldn’t work for the listener without decent speakers or headphones, but my counterargument is that my computer speakers can still capture this perfectly, or hell, even my car radio can do that. Great song and great use of a gimmick.

Coldplay X BTS - My Universe (#85 AUS, #96 CAN)

I reeeeeeeeeeeally wish this didn’t get caught between years in the states because while I like “Butter” and “Dynamite”, this is my favorite BTS song thus far. No, it doesn’t match any of Coldplay’s rock hits, but this is still great, from the synth hook making this feel huge to the verses with the synths that sizzle enough to add some legitimate swell that explodes in the chorus, Coldplay and the guys in BTS also have pretty good chemistry, so ARMY, if you were gonna mass buy a song to #1 in 2021, why couldn’t it have been this instead of “Butter”? Yes, I understand that this wasn’t out at the time, but still.

George Ezra - Anyone For You (Tiger Lily) (#54 UK)

Man, this is such an infectious little track, with George Ezra’s beyond likeable presence and the piano-backed beat. This deserved to be fucking everywhere this summer. Yeah, this was definitely my favorite first listen when doing this, incredible jam.

Marshmello & Khalid - Numb (#25 CAN)

But speaking of summer jams...here we have the second collab from Marshmello and Khalid, following 2018’s “Silence”, and this may not be quite as good as “Silence”, which I consider one of the best songs in Marshmello’s discography, but god damn, this is still great, with the great bass melody, the chill, laid-back whistles, and Khalid’s delivery just matching the entire vibe so well, he draws the line between sounding chill and smooth and sounding bored effortlessly. This should’ve been a huge hit in the US this summer. Great track!!

Reve - CTRL + ALT + DEL (#63 CAN)

This is 100% straight banger, with the slap house beat and Reve’s effortless personality here as she rides the beat incredibly, this is an utter club banger, that yeah may hit my weak spots for music, but fuck it, this is a great song.

Shawn Mendes - When You’re Gone (#30 CAN)

Honestly, this may just be my favorite single from Shawn Mendes, with arguably his best ever production, with the acoustics and the incredibly anthemic-feeling percussion. And Shawn Mendes just sells this so well, the song screams “not over it” and Mendes’s delivery matches this sentiment perfectly. Yeah, incredible track, but I’m starting to feel worried for Mendes if this is  how he’s reacting to the breakup while Camila Cabello makes the summery, carefree “Bam Bam”.

Sia - Unstoppable (#93 CAN)

Let’s just get this out of the way first: me liking this song does not mean I support or condone the ableist shit Sia has done/said. Now that that’s out of the way, onto the song itself, this one may be one of the songs that could straddle the line between making the 2023 US year-end and missing it. In case I wind up talking about this song in my best list, though, I’ll keep this relatively brief, this has been resonating a lot with me and it makes me feel unstoppable. I won’t elaborate on this yet, because there is a pretty slight chance that this could make the 2023 US year-end and I may wind up repeating myself in my best list.

Sigala & Talia Mar - Stay The Night (#98 UK)

So given how much I loved “Lasting Lover” with James Arthur in 2021, I had a feeling that I would at least slightly enjoy this, if not love it. And yeah, I absolutely love this, the house production does hit all of my weak spots in music, yes, but Talia Mar’s vocals make her such a dominant presence here, excellent song!

Swedish House Mafia & The Weeknd - Moth To A Flame (#48 CAN)

Ah, Swedish House Mafia’s big comeback after 8-ish years, and given that “Don’t You Worry Child” is a fantastic swan song that may well be the best EDM hit of the 2010s, did this come close to matching? Well, I’ll say this: “Moth To A Flame” is great, but not as much as “Don’t You Worry Child”, call it drastically subverted expectations from me, but I honestly was expecting Swedish House Mafia’s comeback to sound huger than this, this is more understated and dark with some sizzle in the production to match The Weeknd. It is definitely better than “Lifetime”, which I liked at the time but  haven’t revisited in a while now, and honestly forgot existed. That said, I’ve gone on long enough with this song’s shortcomings, “Moth To A Flame” is great, though, mainly because of Abel, his voice just sounds outright heavenly on this beat. So maybe, in a way, this does sound huge because The Weeknd’s voice on this song paired with the production’s darkness, it makes it feel like you’re being sucked into a black hole and Abel is pulling you out, I mean this in a good way, I swear haha. Great track. Like with basically every song in this section, why wasn’t this a huge hit in the states?

The Weeknd - Out Of Time (#83 CAN)

The way Dawn FM was mismanaged will never fail to amaze me, yes, The Weeknd was arguably at his most overexposed at the time of release, but that didn’t stop his collabs like “You Right” or “One Right Now” to become hits! I see no reason why without proper management of the singles,  this wasn’t a bigger hit in the US. But anyway, “Out Of Time” is absolutely great, with the atmospheric production courtesy of the synths and the light string touches(?) and Abel’s great performance here, seriously, I don’t know if it’s the production doing it or good vocal mixing or a combo of both or what, but his falsetto sounds great! This is just an elegant song, great track!

The Weeknd - Sacrifice (#52 CAN)

WHY WASN’T THIS A SMASH HIT HERE?? When this first dropped, I genuinely thought it would be one of, if not the absolute, biggest hits of 2022. Abel’s vocals sound absolutely heavenly, even in the bridge, where he tries to go for a Michael Jackson impression. And then we get that beat, courtesy of Swedish House Mafia, which is incredibly tight. That said, I do think there is probably something missing in this song to make this excellent, and I think it comes down to the production not sounding as huge as I would like it. That said, this is a great track.

Tiesto & Ava Max - The Motto (#16 CAN, #83 AUS, #57 UK)

This is the banger that we may not have deserved, but wanted. Ava Max has grown on me a lot as of late, I think she’s a promising talent with a great vocal range and lots of potential with her ability to make even the most cliche messages in songs be good - if you haven’t already, check out “EveryTime I Cry”, great song. Yes, “The Motto” doesn’t seem to have very strong lyrics. Club cliches being your “motto” (Drop a few bills then pop a few champagne bottles) seems a bit tired to me, even in a club banger like this. But “The Motto” works for me on production, with the slap house just completely slapping and Ava Max herself having a lot of personality, yes, some may see this as just another faceless EDM track, but fuck it, this is a great song.

And that’s that! I know I keep saying that I’d take a break until my 2023 lists at the end of the year, but this time, I mean it, I promise hahaha. The Spotify playlist below this article should include every song that would've theoretically been eligible to be mentioned.

Spotify playlist with every theoretically eligible song